KCBDC: Minutes for Fall 2005

Kenyon College Ballroom Dance Club: Minutes for Fall 2005

8/30/05
9/6/05
9/20/05
9/27/05
10/4/05
10/18/06
10/25/05
11/01/05
11/08/05
11/15/05
12/06/05

Minutes for 10/18

In attendance:
...well, bless my stars and garters. I forgot to list the attendees in my notes.
Whoopsie!

Well, okay. Just imagine we're all here, each and every one of us. Picture it in
your mind's eye.

And, while you're at it, imagine that we're wearing really stylish/dapper
clothing. And have great hair. And....

...oh, dear. Best not let your imagination get carried away, eh? This is an
officer's meeting, not a drunken bacchanalia. Despite some of the stories you
may have heard. They're lies, I tell you. Scurrilous lies!

Now, then...

Before the meeting begins, we chat for a while about Facebook. There are some
professors on it, including Paolo Asso. How about that?

Meeting begins.

- Allyson: “Let's start. I have... yeah.”

- As Marta is unable to attend this meeting, on account of being off somewhere
being showered with gold and promises by the English department, she has given
Valerie a list of things to bring up. And here they are!

1. Peter should send an email announcing that Sunday's practice is canceled, on
account of it being right after Purdue, and also on account of Svetlana not
being able to come.

2. We need to get a final membership list to the SAC pronto. As soon as we know
whether we need student IDs for this list, we'll compile it and turn it in.

Well, actually there were only two things on that list. Does that count as a
“list”? Perhaps a “listlet” or “listling?”

“Listino”?

- Valerie informs us that we have vans for UConn. We also have a list of people
who are going. Cool!

Ben: “I can see the opportunity here to make a joke using the phrase 'UConn
Ho!'. But I'm not going to. It'd probably get me slapped.”

- We will take this year's team photograph on Wednesday, after the Latin dress
rehearsal.

- Ben suggests that, sometime after the competition, we have a night on which we
just teach fun moves (e.g. sugar walks). It's a cool idea. We just might do
that.

- Scott suggests that we should probably go and learn paso doble before we try
to teach it. There is general agreement with this idea.

- Allyson asks whether she can be naked for the team photo. We find ourselves
forced to say no, on the grounds that you probably shouldn't get naked in Gund
Ballroom. Ben mentions that we could Photoshop a nude Allyson into the final
team photo, then adds “...but I volunteer to not do that.”

- Are the vans for Purdue all set up? Yes, they are. There are two off them.
Valerie, our Comp Coordinator, is in the first one. It's “Five Newbies and Me”,
she says, and adds that that sounds like a children's book.

If it were like the children's book, though, Valerie would be able to grant
wishes. And she could give everyone bright, pretty wings, and we could all fly
to Purdue. (Except for Marta, of course, because as seen in the last minutes,
she already can fly. Shh! It's a secret!).

- Brendan asks which date people need to submit the UConn money to him by.
Valerie has the answer to this, as she does to all things (she's that good). In
this case, the answer is Tuesday, October 25th.

- We all comment on each other's stylish and/or dapper clothing. And great hair.
Then the meeting, predictably, degenerates into a drunken bacchanalia. Well,
what did you expect?

Meeting ends. Zowie!
Ballroom minutes for 10/25/05

In attendance:
Marta Evans
Jeff Force
Ben Wright-Heuman
Valerie Schmidt
Brendan Cox
Peter Catlin
Allyson Whipple
Scott Brown
Becca Helton
Autumn Shoaf

Does anyone know what “Lof” means? I've written it at the top of my notes for
this meeting, but I've no idea what I meant by it. I just know that, before the
meeting started, we talked about lof. Perhaps we talked about lof for some time,
debating the pros and cons, or perhaps we compared the various varieties in
which lof comes. Perhaps someone in the group had recently loffed, and was
ready to share the experience with us. Who knows? I haven't a clue, other than
the word itself.

I do, however, know what the next note on my page -- “the Do Me Decimal System”
-- means. It refers to a wonderful idea someone had for what one can do in a
library other than study. [Secretary's note: it starts when someone checks you
out...]

Meeting begins, given a loose interpretation of “meeting” and a healthy sense of
humor about “beginning”.

Frankly speaking, this particular beginning seemed to center around broccoli.

Marta takes charge: “Okay. We have a meeting that's not about broccoli!”

Marta explains that before the meeting, she wrote several items of business she
wanted to talk about. Specifically, she wrote them on her hand. Then she washed
her hands. Oops! It's still somewhat legible, at least.

- The first order of business: Drg oo. “Drg oo?” We are not sure what this
means. Marta looks at her hand again. Dec 3rd! It's the first Saturday in
December, and it's when we think we're going to hold Snow Ball.

Will there be an exhibition? We hope so. That's what people come for.

We should reserve the space by 11/15. We should also get funding by then (from
such sources as Peirce Funds, Fun Funds, Social Board, and perhaps ODADAS).
Marta and Brendan will powwow over this.

[Secretary's note: We do know what “powwow” means, yes? It's when one person
goes “pow!” and another person goes “wow!” In this group, it happens all the
time; we're so good at going “pow!” that everyone who sees us goes “wow!”]

After some discussion, we decide that Snow Ball should start at 10:00 and end at
1:00, because no one will stay later than 1:00 anyway, and that way we don't
have to stay up late cleaning up.

In the past we've had a ballroom dance lesson at Snow Ball. We're not going to
do that this year. We want people getting their groove on in the usual,
intuitive way. To that end, Marta will ask Billy Callis about DJ'ing again. He
and his fellow DJ were awesome last year. We want them again.

At this point, Peter gets up to forage for breadsticks. While he's away, Brendan
takes over as secretary, and in honor of that, I'm going to reproduce verbatim
his contribution to the minutes:

“Wow! I'm a secretary!”
“Exhibition: 10:30, start at 10 pm, 30 minutes for trickle”

Then Peter comes back, and benevolently bestows breadsticks on the ballroomers,
then bows beatifically. Hooray!

[Secretary's note: Fun English fact! That was “alliteration” there, from the
roots “a-”, meaning “not”, and “litera”, meaning “humble”.]

Brendan asks whether we'll be collecting donations for New Directions again this
year. Answer: probably. Will we be matching donations from our own funds?
Answer: we don't know yet.

- We want to get Marta on the ballroom account instead of Allyson.

- Valerie brings up Ohio Star Ball. How much does it cost to just spectate, and
not dance? It turns out that it's still $65 dollars, even if you don't dance.
Ouch.

Unfortunately, Sage can no longer come to OSB. This means, among other things,
that Sage's car can no longer come, either, and since we can't get Kenyon vans,
this is an issue. We're down to Scott's car and Jon's car. We need more cars.

We talk for a terribly long time about how to drive everyone there with only two
cars. Can it be done? We shall see.

Helle's family lives in Columbus, and has offered to host two female dancers for
OSB. Yay! Helle, not only do we love you, but you have an awesome family.

- At this point my notes say “Laundry! Vociferous discussion.” As I recall, this
discussion lasted for quite some time. Okaaaaaaay....

- The Gund sound system. We want to get certain folks on the “allowed to use it”
list. We need to get back to Victor Lamond about this. Marta has gotten the key
from Security so often that Security thinks she's the sound system manager;
they've given her name to at least one person who had a sound system question.
Yikes!

- There's a square dance Friday night (the 28th). Tickets will be sold at the
door, and all money will go to New Directions.

- Meeting ends. Gadzooks!

[Secretary's note: That's “Gadzooks”, from the roots “Gad”, meaning “God”, and
“Zooks”, meaning “enjoys a good laugh now and then”. The suffix “zooks” also
appears in phrases such as “Graham Gundzooks”, or the pointed and poignant
“Lofzooks”.]

[Ah, Lofzooks! How true!]
Minutes for 11/01/05: "Oh! How Twee!"

In attendance:
Marta Evans
Ben Wright-Heuman
Valerie Schmidt
Brendan Cox
Peter Catlin
Allyson Whipple
Scott Brown
Jeff Force
Allison Goldsmith
Becca Helton
Autumn Shoaf

Before the meeting begins, Allyson sees funnel cake on someone's plate. Her ire
rises. She tells us the story of her summer making funnel cake at an amusement
park, complete with the bit where she slipped on the greasy floor and
dislocated her shoulder. Wow. We offer our sympathies.

Allyson (talking about emergency rooms and painkillers): “Painkillers during
childbirth can paralyze you!”

Brendan: “I know – it happened to me!”

We offer our sympathies to Brendan, and ask whether it was a boy or a girl.
Sadly, he doesn't know – the baby was lost.

Ben: “Brendan was the baby!”

We wonder – if the baby was lost, and Brendan was the baby, how can he be
sitting here now?

Peter: “He must have been found again!”

***Meeting begins. Marta would like to talk about numbers for the Snow Ball,
numbers such as these:
$400 to have the tables moved.
$120 for the DJs
$500 (approximately) for the professional dance exhibition

Do we want coolers from Aramark? No. They're too expensive. We'll get water &
soda from Kroger. We will also get ice, because ice is nice. [Secretary's note:
...but mice are twice as nice! And oh! how twee!]

We'll need two tables for the food and one for the DJs, who will also need
speakers and a microphone.

Ben will check to confirm that the Great Hall's been reserved.

This Sunday, we'll ask Svetlana about an exhibition. The exhibition is always
the biggest draw to Snow Ball, so let's hope we can have one this year. As best
as we can recall, the price is $500, which is actually quite a bargain for a
professional dancer's fee. In other words, the price is nice. [Secretary's
note: Twice will suffice for this hackneyed device].

We still have napkins, plates, and bowls from last year, but we might need
tablecloths.

***A correction/clarification from last week's minutes: you don't have to pay
$65 to watch the Ohio Star Ball amateur competition, just the professional
competition. Theoretically it's $10 to spectate at the amateur comp, but we
doubt anyone will have to pay.

***We have the vans for UConn now, which is ironic, because we're not going
after all. We need to cancel the check we sent them. We also need to ask them
to rip it up.

Announcement for people who already paid for UConn: you can get a refund from
Brendan if you want, but it'd probably be easier to just credit it to OSB.

***Allyson: “I USA-Dancified myself last night!”

Clarification: this means that she has reregistered as a member of USA Dance
(formerly known as USABDA). If you plan on going to competitions, and you
haven't yet done this, you should. You can do it here:
https://secure.usabda.org/index.cfm

***Elections! When shall we hold them? We usually do them the Wednesday before
the last officers' meeting. When will the last officers' meeting be?

***Allyson requests that Peter send her the program he used to make the photo
pages on the club website. He will do so.

***Marta suggests that we put together a compendium of “how you do this” (as she
puts it). The class of 2006 has learned a lot of things about running the club,
and we're all going to be graduating next year, so we should pass on our wisdom
to the next generation, in the form of a holy book of knowledge. Or, more
likely, a holy pamphlet.

Valerie: “Let's call it 'Ask Jody Vance'.”

***Back to the subject of elections. Do we want to do some sort of “job
shadowing” program, in which old officers continue their jobs for some time
after an election, so the new officers can shadow them? Yeah, we think we do.
Jeff suggests that the entire spring semester be devoted to shadowing. Marta
suggests that just the last month of it would do. We decide to hold the spring
elections (for fall of '06) in early April.

***We discuss ways of getting non-officers to come to officers' meetings.
Allison (that's “Allison”, with no Y) is here for her first time (yay
Allison!), and points out that many of the non-officers have (a) no idea
they're encouraged to come to officers' meetings, and/or (b) no idea when and
where the meetings are held. She suggests we clarify that in the minutes, which
is an astute idea.

Someone points out that while we do want people to come to the meetings, we
don't want them to come just to chat, because heaven knows we have enough
irrelevant chatter at these things already. No, the real idea, the thought that
thrills us from the tips of our toes to the ends of our ears, is the thought of
non-officers coming and participating in the running of the club.

[Perhaps we should specify that “running of the club” does not, actually, refer
to a grand event in which KCBDC members are set loose to run through the
streets of Pamplona. No. That would be silly.]

[...silly, but intriguing...]

Here, then is the announcement, to everyone in the club. We love you all! Please
come run the club with us! Officers' meetings are every Tuesday at 5:30 in the
Lower Dempsey meeting room (at the far south end of Lower Dempsey). Just grab
some food and walk on in.

***Meeting ends. Jeepers!
Minutes for 11/08/05: "Philosophy of Really Hard Things"

In attendance:
Marta Evans
Ben Wright-Heuman
Valerie Schmidt
Brendan Cox
Peter Catlin
Allyson Whipple
Scott Brown
Becca Helton
Autumn Shoaf

Before the meeting begins, Peter wants a napkin. So he says "I want a napkin".
Then he realizes that there's a napkin on the table in front of him -- wow! His
wish was granted! He should take advantage of this and ask for something else.

But what? Suggestions pour in, but Peter ignores them all and instead asks for a
clockwork monkey, which the universe, spitefully, fails to provide. Amid the
ensuing surprise and disappointment, the meeting begins.

***Snow Ball
-Marta gives Brendan the Peirce Funds form.
-The budget is looking up. We asked for, and received $350 to have the tables
moved, as well as $450 for the exhibition and DJs, and some money for
publicity. Apparently the Kenyon administration is more beneficent than the
universe as a whole.
-Svetlana has agreed to do an exhibition! We are overjoyed. We will, however,
have to talk to the crowd in between dances, which means that in the next few
weeks, we'll have to come up with (a) someone adept at public speaking, and (b)
something to talk about.
-In past years we've collected money at the door for New Directions, the women's
shelter in Mt. Vernon, as part of the 10 Days of Gender Activism. This year,
though, the 10 Days fall earlier in the year, and will be over by the time Snow
Ball rolls around. Do we want to collect the money anyway?
-We will have Billy Callis and Phil Thompson again as our DJs, because they
rock. And their music is fantabulous. Just like last year, we'll give them a CD
of ballroom songs to throw into their mix, but we'll make sure that all of the
ballroom songs can also be danced to in a non-ballroom fashion.

***Someone has reserved the Lower Dempsey meeting room for us for the spring
semester. We have no idea who. Perhaps the universe as a whole, feeling guilty
for not providing a simple clockwork monkey when an innocent young college
student asks for one, has sent an email to Catherine Levingood requesting our
reservation for us.

(Never mind that these two events occurred in reverse order. The universe as a
whole transcends our mundane concept of "time".)

(And probably our mundane concept of "email", too, come to think of it.)

***We've submitted our official list of members for the fall semester, meaning
that "ballroom dance" should show up on people's lists of official
extracurricular activities. Yay!

***Ohio Star Ball
-As things stand no, none of the newcomers going to OSB are guys. This means all
the newcomers will have to dance bronze in order to have partners. Oh well.
-Ohio State is giving us housing, and our gratitude is as endless as... um...
something endless. Like the Peirce Hall lines at 12:05 on a Monday. That's how
endless our gratitude is.
-We'll need another car. Ten people, plus all their ballroom stuff and their
Thanksgiving luggage, will not fit in two cars. It would look like we were
trying to take the universe as a whole to the competition with us.

***Allyson has a question for Valerie, but Valerie is too cute for Allyson to
remember what she was going to ask.

***Peter asks about the last officers' meeting of the semester. When shall it
be? Allyson suggests that it should be earlier rather than later, to make sure
it happens "before people take off". As she says this last bit, she gestures
with both hands and falls out of her chair.

Marta: "Allyson is a dancer. She has natural grace."

We decide that our last officers' meeting for the fall semester shall be on
December 13th. This means that ELECTIONS for the spring semester shall be on
Wednesday, December 7th. Pretty soon we'll start taking nominations.

Meeting ends. Crikey!

After the meeting, instead of leaving, we poke each other. Quite a lot of
poking. Actually, an astounding amount of poking.

Allyson is talking about philosophy. She says there are easy philosophy classes,
and then there are the classes that people like Russell take: "Philosophy of
Really Hard Things".

We seize upon this instantly as a truly wonderful title for a class. In fact, we
love it so much that we suggest other possible Kenyon classes in the same vein:

"Physics of Really Hard Things"

"Women and Really Hard Things"

"Really Hard Things in Context"

"Really Hard Things Throughout History"

"Really Hard Things of the African Diaspora"

"Organic Chemistry of Really Hard Things"

"The Twentieth-Century Really Hard Thing"

"Freud"

On that note, people finally leave. After everyone has left, the silence of the
empty room is disturbed by a small "poof!" as a clockwork monkey appears on the
table next to where Peter was sitting. It looks around, surprised by the vacant
room, then pulls out a large pocketwatch and examines it closely. Then, with
another "poof!", it disappears, and the room falls quiet again.
Minutes for 11/15/05: "Projectile-Birth Puppy Cannon"

Coming up next... a very special edition of the Ballroom Minutes Show, broadcasting live from Peter's house, somewhere in a mid-Atlantic state that begins with the letter "N"! Typed on a computer next to a picture of a caribou, so you know it's not only good for you, it also makes gratuitous reference to hooved ungulates! Don't miss it! Our nostrils are positively flaring in anticipation!
Minutes for 11/29/05: "Food, Monkeys!"

In attendance:
Marta Evans
Ben Wright-Heuman
Valerie Schmidt
Brendan Cox
Peter Catlin
Allyson Whipple
Autumn Shoaf
Scott Brown (later)

We are gathering for the meeting. Valerie comes in.
Valerie: “What's going on?”
Peter: “Food.”
Allyson. “Monkeys!”

Marta has a song she needs to sing. Valerie says she'll sing Marta's harmony.
Allyson says she'll sing Brendan's harmony, but we are slow to understand, so
Allyson must clarify that she's not saying she'll date him. Marta is shocked.
“You'd sing his harmony without dating him? You'd have casual harmony?”
Valerie: “Just use protection. You wouldn't want to wind up with an unwanted
chord!”

Meeting begins.

***Star Ball
- Ben has ordered table tents and flyers
- Brendan has asked about Social Board funds and Peirce Funds funds. (Funds
funds? funds funds funds?)
- Fun Funds has given us $150, which is $50 less than we asked for but about
what we expected
- Matt Reynolds will DJ
- Where will we get speakers and a table?

Scott comes in, like a cool mountain breeze through a screen door.

[Except he doesn't flow through a bunch of little holes. That would be weird.]

- Set-up times. There will be two of them: Saturday afternoon and in the evening
right before the dance.
- We have white lights to set up, and some leftover stuff from last year
(streamers, plates, etc.). We need to inventory these items before going
shopping for the dance.
- We need people to talk to the crowd in between the exhibition dances, while
Svetlana's getting changed. We figure we'll just talk about Svetlana & her
partner, about ballroom in general, and about the Kenyon club, but we'll still
need to fill some time. Anyone feel chatty?
- We need to reserve Peirce Lounge for Svetlana to change in between dances. Ben
will do this.

***Elections
- Elections for the spring semester will be held on Wednesday the 7th in Gund
Ballroom at 10:15 PM.

Scott: “Can we have a mini election party with snacks?”
Valerie: “Can we have a mini crossdressing party with snacks?”

(Allyson is excited by this last proposal.)

Marta points out that the whole “elections = party” thing is for the end-of-year
elections, when everyone's going away. These are just the end-of-Fall-semester
elections.

We still want snacks. Someone will probably bring cookies. And hey, anyone who
wants to crossdress is still welcome to. This consoles Allyson somewhat.

- Peter will email election directions, including position descriptions, out to
the club. And also... hey, wow, that rhymed! Twice! I'm a poet!

***Budget Hearing
- Brendan has signed up for a budget hearing.
- We haven't used all the Svetlana lessons they gave us for the Fall semester.
The question is, can we keep the money for those lessons AND get money for the
full complement of Spring lessons? That's what we're going to shoot for. That's
what we need to make a case for.

Allyson: “We should just have Valerie show up in her corset.”
Marta: “I think we need to make a case that doesn't involve boobs.”

***Awesome Freshmen
- Helle and Arianna had some ideas for practices. They are:

Idea #1: Do Svetlana's warm-up and/or drill at the beginning of every practice.
- We think this is a great idea. We want to do this.

Idea #2: Designate some nights of the week as Smooth/Standard nights and some as
Rhythm/Latin nights.
- Scott points out that if a person regularly misses one particular night of the
week, they might wind up missing all of Smooth/Standard (or Rhythm/Latin).
- We will ask the other members of the club what they think about this.

Meeting ends. Gee whillikers!
Minutes for 12/06/05: "We'll Always Have Dempsey"

Dear KCBDC,

Um... oh jeez, this is awkward. I sort of have something to tell you. I mean, I
didn't mean to tell you like this, but a lot of stuff happened, and, so, well...

I think I should stop being your secretary. Please don't take this as an insult!
It's not you, it's me. I could never be for you everything you needed from a
secretary, sweetheart, you know that. All those weeks when I was late with the
minutes, all those times I misattributed quotes, well, you just sat there and
took it. You were so good to me, darling, and I'll always treasure our time
together. But I understand that you've moved on, and you need someone else...

I've gotta be honest with you, KCBDC. I know you're already seeing another
secretary. I guess I shouldn't be so surprised -- heck, I practically set the
two of you up! -- but still, it's not something I can just brush aside. I've
been sitting here thinking about it, and I want you to know I'm happy for you.
I hope he writes minutes for you that make you feel special, make you feel like
a real student organization. I hope he is the secretary I could never be for
you. *sniffle*

But before I set my keyboard aside, never again to use your email account, I
thought maybe we could have just one last set of minutes together. One final
email, in remembrance of all the good times together.

Please say yes. It would mean ever so much to me.

Fondly and devotedly
~Peter

******

Minutes for 12/06/05

In attendance:
Marta Evans
Ben Wright-Heuman
Valerie Schmidt
Brendan Cox
Peter Catlin
Allyson Whipple
Jeff Force
Becca Helton
Autumn Shoaf

Peter walks into the room, just as someone says "...if you spiked pot with
amphetamines, they'd just cancle each other out, wouldn't they?" So it looks
like the theme of our pre-meeting conversation this time is drugs.

Marta: "I've been round the drug carousel many a time." (Relax, kids -- she's
talking about medicinal drugs! Illegal drugs are not sold on carousels. We
hope).

Meeting begins.

***Snow Ball is over! We did it!
Notes for next year
- Get 8 things of soda
- Get alternative sources of light

Peirce was gorgeous. Thank yous to everybody who helped set up, and a special
thank you to Valerie, who had the idea of running the lights from the balcony
down to the walls. It was spectacularific.

***Elections tomorrow
- Peter will resend the list of nominees
- Everybody wants to be Historian this year, it seems. Why do you suppose that
is?

Peter: "It's an entry-level position. Like an entry-level drug." We get you
hooked on officering, and sooner or later you find yourself progressing along
the ladder of depravity we call the List of Officers. Marta, obviously, is
riding a carousel horse up this ladder, just like they did in Mary Poppins.
Except you can't ride horses up ladders. Maybe it's actually a racetrack of
depravity?

***Money
- Our Star Ball check bounced. Valerie is working on getting the money to them.
There's only one person who still needs to pay for Star Ball
(coughcoughAllysoncough).
- Marta will finally be put on the bank account, replacing Allyson. They'll do
that sometime this weekend.
- We need to look over our old bank statements, which Allyson has been getting
instead of Brendan. [Let's not call that an "ambiguous" statment. Let's call it
a "sentence of alternative clarity", so as not to hurt its feelings.]
- Our books don't balance. We need to go over them and figure out why. Could it
be that the UConn check was not destroyed after all? We need to look into this.

***Last Svetlana lesson
- This Sunday, the 11th. Come!

***We have our spring budget from the BFC!
- We got two comp's worth of transportation money, for University of Michigan
and OSU. We can do a third competition with the leftover money from Cornell if
we want.
- We have money for 12 Svetlana lessons. Yay!
- We didn't get money for lessons in Columbus, but some people have
free, "complimentary lesson" cards they can use. It is, however, spelled
"complementary lesson", with an "e", on the card. "Complementary" means that it
goes well with something else. We wonder what that something else might be.

Jeff: "It goes well with lessons you pay for."

***The end! Or is it...
- And so we come to the end of the Peter Catlin era of minutes. Next week
Brendan Cox, a better man than I, steps into the breach to give you some good
old ninja-secretary lovin'. For my part, I'm just about done. There are only
two things left for me to do.

1. Quote Becca out of context. "They're grinding people up and putting them in
pies!", she said, cheerfully.

2. Ride off into the sunset on a carousel horse.

YEEHAW!!!!!
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